Rules for working for the Government

Some simple, but very important rules

Do tomorrow what you are supposed to do today
Do next week what you are supposed to do tomorrow
Do next month what you what you are supposed to do next week
Do next year what you are supposed to do next month
Never do what you are supposed to next year
For any enquiries addressed to you, the other person is the correct person
The buck never stops here, there or anywhere
Outsource what you can, whenever you can, wherever you can, to whosoever who can do it or cannot do it
(PS: don’t forget your "commission" in cash or kind)
Never answer anything “Yes or No." Your answer should be " may be; yes, but; I will think over; can I get back to you on that?"
Do not ask your colleague or another government employee a direct question. Always begin with “Suppose" and convert your question into a hypothetical situation, both of you knowing very well that it is the real situation that you are discussing. You will, in all probability, get a non-committal reply, thus both of you cover your back if anything goes wrong!!